The past couple of years I’ve been pretty darn vocal about being #CONFIDENT in your own body. I’ve been an advocate for slaying your inner voice telling you that you’re not good enough and shouted about self love whilst topless on the internet.
But lately somethings have changed for me and I feel like a fraud.
I spoke about it in this Insta caption about how I didn’t love the way I looked that day. I put it down to a rubbish day. I just wasn’t feelin’ myself. And ya know maybe it isn’t the most flattering of photos. That’s okay. But what isn’t okay is way I’ve allowed negative self-talk to flood my mind on not just a day here and there but for weeks and months. It hasn’t been huge deal, like I’m not crying in the corner refusing to leave the house, but a negative mindset does really get you feeling a bit… Well rubbish, eh?
Gurl, this is #realtalk at it’s realist cuz FIRST THINGS FIRST IMMA REALIST.
I’m not gonna beat myself up about it and spiral down into a Britney ’07 type ordeal. And gals – I do not hate myself one bit. I still love myself sick and think I’m a 10/10 queen. Hmmmm maybe lets just say I’m a queen who has misplaced her crown for the moment but once it is located the chaos will be over. And ya know what? I am going to own it and it’s important for me to share it with all of you gals because it’s something I don’t feel spoken about online all that much by people like me. I am just an average gal with my mind playing tricks on me. I’m not a strong plus-size woman advocating for inclusiveness nor am I some sort of Victoria Secret model either. I am just Sarze who floats somewhere between a size 8 and 12 flying under the radar most of the time… PS – obvs here for all kinds of sexy women cuz ILY GALS AND YOU’RE ALL MYSTICAL CREATURES THAT RULE DA WORLD.
Pretty much if you read in between all the rambles about I’ve been in a shitty spot that past couple of months and now I’m here to publicly declare that is A-OK SARZE.
Tbh since moving/adjusting/figuring my life up here out this gal hasn’t been on the biggest healthy train. In fact I have allowed processed foods to creep back into my everyday life, artificial sugar (herro from a relapsed Diet Coke addict) and ya know just generally been carbo loading for no marathon… Just everyday life. And I’m not here screaming at you lads DO NOT EATING A FUCKING CARB EVER AGAIN. I’m here saying – my diet is something that really affects my brain and my body. I’m a very sensitive gal and I feel best when I’m being (what I interpret as) healthy 90% of time and having treat yo self moments maybe once or twice a week…. Not on an average Monday to celebrate the fact that I got my period… Ya catching what I’m kicking? Just slowing down the YOLO moments and focusing on the good stuff.
As someone who has struggled with my relationship with my body and food in the past I feel a bit sad I’ve gone back to a negative headspace but also proud I’m pulled myself up on it before I end up shaving my head like old mate Britney. If you follow me on Instagram (YA SHOULD) I talk a bit on stories about choices, mindset and gratitude. So if I’m giving that a fair whirl here I’m gonna say that I’m very grateful for the fact these past few months I’ve felt a bit shit because it’s a reminder of how amazing I can feel about myself. Now I’m going to make the choice to step away from the Diet Coke, focus on the things I love like, damn girl look at dem legs *insert fire emoji* and hit the gym a little more.
So gals I’ve been a bit of a royal dick to myself lately but now I’m gonna make small changes to make myself feel dandy again. I’m excited ’bout it and I hope if y’all are feeling that way that you find a few changes in your world that make you feel like a queen rocking that fucking crown like the 10/10 that you are.
Have you ever felt like you’re a deep dark hole? Cuz lol same.
PS – I know alot of you get concerned when I talk about this sort of stuff. I am hand-on-my-heart absolutely fine with talking about all these feels otherwise I wouldn’t. Imma a smart gal.
*OBVS I’m here for ALL types of women. Just speaking from my own experience and point of view.
I'm a retail manager by day and a blogger by night aiming to bring you the newest beauty, fashion and lifestyle news. More Than Adored was created to help beauty lovers, like myself, make informed decisions when it comes to buying new goodies.